Decision making is one area I am happy to speak about. I am equally happy I grabbed the inspiration to pen this down when it came. Many people miss out on life’s golden opportunities because of poor decision making. Decision making techniques are not cast on stone and may not even work same for every situation; but one thing that is sure in every decision making is ‘You’. With this I dare to say that the best decision you can ever make is to have yourself and your happiness at the center of it. This story is centered around the best decision I made earlier in life and why I consider it the best.
At spinsterhood, like every other young woman, I had the opportunity of choosing the one with whom I will spend the rest of my life with from other numerous suitors. This decision was difficult because all suitors and intended in-laws lined up almost at the same time. The confusing part of all this was that they all had good potentials. The ladies can relate to this.
My final choice on this was enabled by two things- first a good advice from my sister and my ability to apply my heart to evidences laid before me. Here are a few things that helped me during that phase.
- Seek wisdom: At every time when you are faced with decisions, it is possible for you as an individual to see things only from your perspective. With a new perspective comes different options. In my case, my sister’s input on the choices I had to make were golden. Always endeavor to speak to people who you feel have the capacity to contribute meaningfully to the decision you are about to take. This step is followed by the next.
- Sample all evidences before you:At that time, my sister had given me a very critical assignment. She had asked that I write down 10 things I was pleased about for each of my suitors and 10 things that displeased me. What she did invariably was to allow me analyze the data (evidences) before me before making a decision. Evidence based analysis of situations helps us make decisions that are not clouded by emotions- be it fear or anxiety.
- Be unbiased:Once you have analyzed the evidences before you, it is important to keep an open mind to the outcome/s. Sometimes, our expectations change when we have paid attention to details. It is better to keep an open mind and just watch things unfold especially when we have done our bit. In my case, the suitors I felt were tops didn’t make it to the top list and I had to make an effort to allow them leave naturally.
- Step aside:While going through these processes of decision making, it is important to step aside. Give yourself some space from the process to allow you think clearly or also deliberate on the findings of your analysis. Being clogged up with the same people or issues you are trying to take a decision on, may cloud your judgment.
- How it makes you feel: Every good decision that you make should make you feel happy or good. This is the crux of a good decision making process. You can only achieve this feeling of contentment when your selfish self has been put into consideration in that decision. In my case it was a journey till eternity and such are not decisions you make based on other people’s conviction. I made my decision after weighing my options and that makes me feel great. So even when challenges show up, I recall I made this decision based on my personal conviction; and so I move on.
While there are lots of theories to decision making, I encourage you to only make decisions that make you happy.